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RESPECT IS MUTUAL; It's about time some people had a lesson
Topic Started: Dec 19 2004, 06:44 AM (228 Views)
Fudgie
Guy Fawkes' Campaign Manager

I am furious. I've just discovered that 2 people I hold very dear to me, and valuable to the SP have left these forums due to a lack of respect for their wishes, and most importantly, a lack of respect for the people they are.

The South Pacific has always had a strong friendship base underneath it. I value the people here, to the extent where I exchange more than PM's and IM conversations with a few people. Some people on these forums even have my home address and telephone number, which is saying a lot for the friends I have made. I truly care for some of the people on these forums.

I am absolutely DISGUSTED to think that someone could be so low as to let themselves sink to the level of schoolyard backstabbing, and pettiness. Respect is a mutual thing. If someone asks you via PM not to do something, they have a damn good reason to ask that. It might be a violation of a personal beleif, be it religious, or that person's own moral values, it may be offensive, or, they may not like you. They have, however RESPECTED you enough to contact you about the issue and perhaps explain why they do not like it. If this is the case, you have one of 2 options.

1. Take their request on board, and RESPECT their wishes, by altering the post, and perhaps apologising.

2. Take the issue to either the SoJ, or and Admin if you are not happy with the response.

Think about your actions. Use your brain and think about how the other people will react. Don't assume anything. And those of you who think that a disclaimer can exclude you, don't even dare assume that. That is the biggest cop out I can think of. Disclaimers will not save you from a warning. We have proven that in the past, and certainly we will do it again.

I'm going to revert back to an earlier rant I made here. I once said that people on these forums come from a diverse and cross cultural background. What is acceptable in your country/culture/beliefs, may not be acceptable 20 miles away. Be it something simple like a hug, or something more complex as a sexual overture, you need to realise that someone possibly will be offended. My personal example is this. I am person who likes hugs. However, I also have a very big thing on my personal space. You don't cross that line, unless I invite you to. This is everywhere. Online, RL everwhere. It's a simple thing, a hug, yet, if you cross into my space without an invitation, I will simply shut down and I will not acknowledge you. Perhaps you will see this as rude, yet, I have my personal reasons for this. I am a private person. I like to keep some things to myself, and I have a fairly large personal space. So those people who get hugs from me, via IM or RL, will know that this is a big thing for me.

If someone approaches you and asks for things to be toned down, RESPECT their wishes. There is always a method to madness, and there is always a reason behind things. They aren't saying it to be vindictive (however, if they are, then they really need to think about their actions), they have a genuine reason.

I cannot beleive that I have to make this post, I am so ashamed of the recent behaviours causing my friends to leave. To JD and PapaC, I hope that your absence causes you to grow stronger in your love, and I only hope that you can return soon. To the people that have made them feel uncomfortable, I only hope that you are satisfied. I would also hope that an apology is made to PC and JD soon from you.

I am now laying this issue on your shoulders, citizens of the SP. Please don't post in this thread saying you agree with me, or that I'm right. I don't want that. I want you to absorb every word said here, and if you feel a little bit guilty reading this, then perhaps think about why.

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Military Force
Wandering Ghost

Ok this is pretty F-ed up, esp considering I'm supposed to be acting like the self centered arrogant jerk around here. Y'all are older and supposedly a lot more mature, I find this dubious at best. Quite frankly it's not complicated, grow up or shut up. Not hard. I'd like to corgially invite those of you involved to politely pull your heads out of your asses and apologise. Questions? Comments? Concerns?

Oh and btw: if i don't hear about certain people making profuse apologies i will publicly ask you to do so in this thread, and i dare anyone to tell me i can't. :angry: Like seriously if i were JD and PC i'd prolly just lash out and either RP bitch slap you into intelligence, or i would just flame the living fuck outa you. Either way i would have the admins kick your ass. And don't think that isn't outa the question, nothing would make me happier than a chance to delete you and slap down an IP ban. But the other admins ae far more forgiving and kind than i am, not to mention level headed. But god help you if JD requests that the admins address it and i hear about it first...
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Semartica
Mikail Vlodmekov, Private Investigations.

They're gone? I never heard about this.
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Athynz
Custom Limo Suspensions are my specialty...

WHAT!?! JD and PapaC are gone? All I can say is whover caused this should apoligize and then leave the SP. Personally I'd rather see MF or Fudgie take those responsible to task publicly and with great attention to detail. To JD and PapaC I hope things work out between the two of you guys and I hope that you'll come back even if it's just to keep in touch.
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Semartica
Mikail Vlodmekov, Private Investigations.

:edited by admin as some of us have faith in the members of the SP:
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Geomania
Former Minister of Security/other stuff

These are REPREHENSIBLE actions of those who harrassed J_delight and Papa C, two VERY productive and valuable nations. These two people have helped our region, whether it be RP or the elections commision. The SP has truly lost two great members.
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LadyRebels
Unregistered

Alright I want to know what happened and where it happened.
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tsrill
Unregistered

This is indeed worrisome. If anyone has any evidence, they are always welcome to file a complaint at the justice department or the administration of this forum.

This is, of course, the procedure in all circumstances. Don't take the law in your own hands if you have a problem with something or someone, but please pass it on to the appropriate authority. That's what we are therefore, to sort such things out.

Personally, I think this is very, very sad. We should be a place where people can relax a bit from their real life and to have some fun. Not a place where people have to be afraid to get there life even more f*cked up than it already is.

-Tsrill.
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PapaC
0.5 Steamie; 0.5 FBB

OK. I want to calm this down a bit.

By way of explanation: things have happened here where RL issues have been brought into the SP and used in a potentially destructive manner. Someone was misled and used as a WMD (Weapon of Messy Destruction), and there has also been a certain amount of naïveté and (excusable) misplaced loyalty. Some of the original offending posts have now been removed, so if you go looking for the evidence, you probably won't be able to piece it all together. And I don't intend to go into any more detail or name names.

It all added up to a situation which JD and I felt very uncomfortable with and we have decided to pull back, at least in the short term, to allow the dust to settle. Neither of us wants to engage in conflict here, this is a much too congenial place for that, and it has been (and will be again in the future, I'm sure) a welcome haven of fun where we've been able to relax, let our hair down, and be ourselves (and many other 'people' as well :lol:).

Neither of us carries grudges around with us. Once issues are dealt with they are gone and, in most cases, genuinely forgotten as well. So fear not: we are not about to hide at the side of the road and ambush anyone with a flamethrower.

Our IDs will stay registered with the SP Forums, and we'll be back from time to time to see how everyone is doing. If and when we reappear more permanently, you may find that our personas have had a bit of a makeover.

So feel free to PM us, but don't expect an immediate reply: we won't be checking in daily. And if one mailbox happens to fill up for any reason, use the other. We share everything :D.

To everyone who has posted here, or has contacted us personally, thank you. Your sentiments are truly appreciated. To those who have got to know either of us on a more personal level, we may share a little more about the situation with you, but only on the understanding that it will not be used in retribution :wub:

I'm going to hand out some thankyou presents at our Betrothal Bash now, and then our incredible DJ, Bob Uppendown will bring things to a close. I have a feeling there might well be some interesting photos to show too, once the place has been returned to normal :blink:

Thanks again folks. Please don't let this create a stormcloud over the place. We could well return, but only if the sun is still shining. In the meantime, take the lemons and make them into lemonade :wub:

Our love and best wishes
Steve (PapaC)
Jamie (J Delight)
:flw2 :heart :flw2
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Fudgie
Guy Fawkes' Campaign Manager

On that note, thank you PapaC and JD, love to you both.

Locked.
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