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Teenage Daughters and Valentine's Day; the parent's perspective.
Topic Started: Feb 16 2006, 08:07 AM (1,132 Views)
somerled
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Admiral MacDonald RN
Swidden
Feb 17 2006, 11:09 AM
A big bunch of roses hunh?

Probably it is a kid her age (maybe a bit older) with a part time job and he spent most of his paycheck (if not all) on this. This is probably the only one worth losing any sleep over, but even then not too much.

The 3 cards are probably nothing to worry about.

Don't ground her for things other people are doing. All you'll do is tick her off and she won't even think of telling you what's going on with her and her life.

I'm not worried about the cards , she's being getting some valentines day cards most years since primary school .


I'm glad she doesn't have a personal mobile phone , or a phone in her bed room .


At this stage crossing the fingers and hoping it's nothing serious .



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Swidden
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Adm. Gadfly-at-large; Provisional wRench-fly at large
somerled
Feb 16 2006, 08:27 PM
I'm glad she doesn't have a personal mobile phone

My brother-in-law gave one to his daughter (our niece that I speak sometimes). She's much younger than your daughter, but the phone is one of those that is limited in the number of phone numbers it can call (4 in this case Dad, Mom, Step-mom, Auntie/Uncle, plus a 911 button).

Too many kids are being given the full range expensive ones!
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somerled
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Admiral MacDonald RN
Swidden
Feb 17 2006, 02:35 PM
somerled
Feb 16 2006, 08:27 PM
I'm glad she doesn't have a personal mobile phone

My brother-in-law gave one to his daughter (our niece that I speak sometimes). She's much younger than your daughter, but the phone is one of those that is limited in the number of phone numbers it can call (4 in this case Dad, Mom, Step-mom, Auntie/Uncle, plus a 911 button).

Too many kids are being given the full range expensive ones!

She doesn't need one - we have 1300 REVERSE on our phone.

Anyway some of her pals have mobiles and if needs to make a call and there is no public phone or landline handy she can use one her pal's phones.
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ImpulseEngine
Admiral
I'm honestly not sure what the big deal is. She's 16ish? Opposite sex attraction is quite common at that age. Four boys interested is probably just a compliment to your daughter. She's either attractive, has a great personality, or both. You can't prevent boys from being interested in her.

Up to now, they have sent cards and roses. So far, that's hardly anything. The only thing I would do in your shoes is be interested as a parent in which, if any, of these boys your daughter actually reciprocates the interest in. Then I would want to know as much as I can about that boy. If, after finding out what you can, the boy seem to be ok, then I would do no more than maintain a watchful eye and keep communications open with your daughter about it all. (Involve your wife if your daughter is more comfortable talking about these things with her.) If, however, a boy that she is interested in is not acceptable to you on some moral or safety type of grounds, then I would do my best to discourage such a relationship.

But, anyway, for now not much has happened so I wouldn't do anything at all yet except watch what happens next. Maybe what's next will simply be nothing.
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Intrepid2002
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UNGH!
^^^^

Wait till your angel starts dating a ®. ;)




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somerled
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Admiral MacDonald RN
Still no information forthcoming yet , so she's grounded .



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8247
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Apparently we look like this now
somerled
Feb 18 2006, 03:59 AM
Still no information forthcoming yet , so she's grounded .

Is it possible that she doesnt know who sent the flowers?
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somerled
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Admiral MacDonald RN
8247
Feb 18 2006, 06:01 PM
somerled
Feb 18 2006, 03:59 AM
Still no information forthcoming yet , so she's grounded .

Is it possible that she doesnt know who sent the flowers?

That is possible.

I'm not prepared to take the risk that a predator (creepy old guy, or young man who might take advantage of her) may have noticed her or be trying to groom / impress her.

If it's a kid, she still has opportunities to see him at school.

She'll just have to be an unhappy camper for a while.

Until she turns 18 , she lives to my wife's and my rules.

Better safe than sorry.
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Fesarius
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Admiral
Somerled,

Question: Are you grounding your daughter because she (unknowingly) received something in the mail? Or do you know for a fact that she is withholding information from you?
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somerled
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Admiral MacDonald RN
Fesarius
Feb 19 2006, 01:06 AM
Somerled,

Question: Are you grounding your daughter because she (unknowingly) received something in the mail? Or do you know for a fact that she is withholding information from you?

My wife and I am grounding her to reduce the risk to her from someone who I suspect is way too old for her.

My wife and I both suspect she knows who sent the expensive bunch of flowers and that she is not being entirely honest with us (this is not something she does very often). Leads me to believe he is definitely too old for her.

We have told her we want to meet the guy and we'll reconcider what happens next then.

We are not punishing her, though she probably sees it that way right now, we have explained that we only want to protect her.
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Fesarius
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Admiral
^^^
I was just curious. I understand a bit better now. :)
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somerled
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Admiral MacDonald RN
Fesarius
Feb 19 2006, 01:24 AM
^^^
I was just curious. I understand a bit better now. :)

I took advice from my mum before acting , she's raised 3 daughters.
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Fesarius
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Admiral
^^^
Somerled,

Glad to hear it! Wisdom is a precious thing. :)
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somerled
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Admiral MacDonald RN
Fesarius
Feb 19 2006, 02:13 AM
^^^
Somerled,

Glad to hear it! Wisdom is a precious thing. :)

So's experience.
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Ra^n
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Lieutenant Junior Grade
Grounded. OMG. She is going through some major changes in her life right now, and on top of all that, grounded. For being the object of someone's attention.
I realize you are trying to save her from what might be out there, but, man. Poor girl.
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