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| Condemned; ft. Kang Ta | |
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| Topic Started: Jan 21 2005, 06:53 PM (427 Views) | |
| Michyu Girl | Jan 21 2005, 06:53 PM Post #1 |
Don't test me.
  ![]](http://z1.ifrm.com/static/1/pip_r.png)
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Totally random idea popped in my head as I was watching a Hee Jun concert, talking to Jess, and playing forum games. @_@ Eh...Enjoy~! Prologue And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them, that the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they [were] fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose. There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare [children] to them, the same [became] mighty men which [were] of old, men of renown. And God saw that the wickedness of man [was] great in the earth, and [that] every imagination of the thoughts of his heart [was] only evil continually. And it repented the Lord that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart. Genesis 6:1, 2, 4-6 The sons of God were angels, and the daughters of men mere humans. The angels chose to be with humans rather than God. They became the fallen angels, condemned for their poor decision. But the children of the forbidden union of angels and humans…were they, too, condemned? Am I…condemned? |
 You can be so open minded that your brain falls out. 'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church. The blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet. Finally, someone tells the truth. Banner credits to Kimmy37. | |
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| shouling | Jan 22 2005, 02:38 PM Post #2 |
Bumble Bee Tuna
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Hmmmmm.... seems like it could be intresting. cant wait to read more Kim~! |
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Hard work doesn't hurt but why chance it.   SEO TAI JI LOVE~!His Story... A Moon Hee Jun Fan Board | |
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| Michyu Girl | Jan 23 2005, 04:30 AM Post #3 |
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Don't test me.
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Part 1 - My Name My name is…unimportant. I don’t use that name. Why bother? It only reminds me of my fate…the fate I cannot change…the fate my forefathers gave to me…the fate I did not choose. Instead I go by a name that gives me hope for my future on earth - Kang Ta, “strong hit.” You think it’s a silly name? I want to be a strong hit. I want to leave my print on this place so that I am not forgotten like so many others… This is all I have, after all. I was born in Seoul, South Korea, but I no longer reside there. There are…too many memories…too many reminders of what was and what’s to come. I had to leave. I left behind…everything. I migrated to America and stayed in New York where there is little reminder of what I am…of what everyone in my family is. My family? Yes, I left them behind, too. I couldn’t bare to see them day in and day out…look into their hopeful eyes, their wishful faces, their false tranquility. They believed that there was hope for our ancestors - for ourselves. That can’t be, though… We are a condemned race - or half race. What are we, anyway? I am twenty-two years old; I am a man. I know what is and is not possible in this realm. You may see me as young, but I have wisdom and knowledge beyond your wildest dreams. It comes with being what I am. What am I? Officially, I am Asian-American…Korean. They see me as human. Am I? I laugh; I cry; I bleed; I heal; I love; I hurt; I feel; I give; I take; I live; I will die one day. Does that make me human? Does that make me the same as you? Maybe. You think so, don’t you? Many believe so. My own family believed that… Well, it doesn’t matter what they believed. They believed many things…things that couldn’t be true. They tried to defy their heritage - their being. They tried to create a new truth - their own truth. I know it can’t be done, though. We are condemned because of our forefathers. They made it so that I could never… What makes me different from humans? Many, many things. There are certain…things I can do…things that humans either can’t or shouldn’t do. You remember Moses and how he turned the water to blood? The staff into a snake? Made the sea part? I can do similar things. I’ve never made the waters part, I’ve never turned inanimate objects into animals, and I’ve never turned water into blood, but I can do “magic,” as humans would call it. Yes, I can do the typical “magic” - start fires, turn things to ice, make pretty colors. I can do other things, though…deadly things. I try to refrain from such actions, though. I can also fly. No, I don’t sprout wings. It’s almost like Superman. I simply take off into the sky. It’s truly the most exhilarating feeling in the world. I feel truly happy and above any and all of my problems when I’m in flight. If only you could experience it, too. …But then you’d be like me - no hope, no dreams, no future. You still don’t know what the other part of me is - the inhuman part? You should be able to look at me and tell. If not, you should hear me sing. That would give you a clue. After all, people say I have the face and voice of an angel. |
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You can be so open minded that your brain falls out. 'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church. The blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet. Finally, someone tells the truth. Banner credits to Kimmy37. | |
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| Michyu Girl | Jan 23 2005, 06:41 PM Post #4 |
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Don't test me.
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Part 2 - I Am I couldn't tell you after all, Even at the last moment I turned around.. I know I can't go back. But it's not an easy thing to do.. erasing you. The words flowed from my lips as the soft notes drifted into the air. The lounge was packed tonight, again. Many teenaged girls lined the stage and back tables, each trying to get a glimpse of me and hoping I’d look back at them. It was the same every night… Everything is still left so clearly that it hurts. If only you can come back.. If it's okay for me to wait.. Why did they continue to flock to my stage? It made no sense… Surely they knew they had no chance. How many times would they leave brokenhearted before they realized I wanted nothing to do with them? Then I won't go too far from your side, So I can come back anytime. Even though the only thing in this empty room now Is a picture of you smiling. If I weren’t what I was, would I encourage their attraction? Would I seek happiness of my own? Something that makes my heart unbearable is the thought of you crying somewhere else just like me. I look so foolish, but I love you. If only you can come back.. If it's okay for me to wait.. A few more dollars were placed in my tip jar. Not surprising. That girl tipped me every night. It was always the same. She’d walk up to the stage, stare at me for a moment, close her eyes as though the song were speaking to her, place a couple of tens in my jar, and wander back to her table to order another drink. Why did she do that every night? Couldn’t she find someone better? Someone…not like me? Then I won't go too far from your side So I can come back anytime. If you are having hard time too, If you are crying like a fool for leaving me Time seemed to stand still in the lounge as the intricate chords streamed from my fingers to the keys. Each note hung in the air and eventually dissipated into the audience as they absorbed it into their being and begged for more. Then will you please come to me now? Though I don't have much, I will protect you forever. I love you. Now even the promise of your return is gone. oh~ The room tensed and sighed pleasingly as I held out the last note of the phrase. It was like they’d never heard anything like it before. With a single memory you left, I will live my life without a greed. I am okay. Only for a while I live in this world, I am letting you go.. A short parting too.. I love you. If only you can come back. Of course they hadn’t. They’d never heard anything like me. I had the voice of an angel with the face to match. That’s why they came every night. That’s why I always left with over three hundred in tips. That’s why I can work at any lounge I chose. …That’s why I can’t have happiness. As I played the last broken chord and waited for the final vibrations of the strings to fade, the audience applauded politely. There was always something else in the applause, though… a certain…sadness. They always hated to see me go…always dreaded the final words of the song. The end was always something to fear… Taking my money, I headed to the bar and requested my paycheck. It wasn’t much, but what I made in tips every night always covered the bills. It was a long walk home. The cold night air kissed my face, leaving numb, icy cheeks in their wake. Normally, this would leave one’s nose red, but it only made my face more beautiful…more angelic. That’s why I always hated winter. It helped to remind me of what I was, and what I could never have… Walking into the lobby of my apartment complex, I waved to the guard and pressed the “up” button on the elevator. Every night was the same… I played at the lounge, got my money, walked home, went to my bedroom, and stared at the ceiling as I d*mned everything so that I wouldn’t be alone. As I carelessly tossed my cash on the finished wooden table, something in the window caught my eye. I slowly sauntered to the iced glass and peered into the dark sky, hoping to somehow make my gaze pierce though the clouds into Heaven itself so that they could see my pain and hatred. As I stared into the night, soft, white flakes floated down, landing quietly, unnoticed, on the ground. Turning my gaze to the alleyway below the window, I noticed someone in the trash bin. He was shivering so violently… It must’ve been well below freezing out there. That poor person had no warmth to call his own, not even a dog to hold. The crisp glass stung my hand as I placed it on the window. The ice around it began to melt and evaporate. Please, let this work, I asked mentally to no one in particular - but certainly not God. A small fire kindled to life amongst the cardboard next to the bin, and the poor man crawled out of the dump to draw closer to the warmth. He obviously didn’t care how the fire came just as long as it was warm. The man turned his face to the sky and mouthed, “Thank you, God.” My heart froze over, as did the fire. What right did God have to any thanks? I was the one that made the fire! I was the one that put some effort forth to save the man from the cold! God did nothing! He was going to let the man freeze to death! It was then I realized I was doing the same thing. He was standing by the frosted cardboard, gazing stupidly at the ashes that no longer promised him a good night. Would I be like God and let the man freeze? Of course, not! Even if he did thank God, I was going to make sure I wasn’t as uncaring as the being he praised. Lighting the fire again, I watched as he squatted beside it and held his hands close to the inviting glow. He may have been confused as to who helped him, but it mattered not in my eyes. In my own way I was defying that God that had turned His back on my family and me by keeping yet another soul from being a victim of “fate.” My shirt fell to the back of a nearby chair as I moved gracefully across the room, removing my belt as I did. Finally stripping down to my undershirt and boxers, I turned the heat on and crawled into my large, white bed. Feathers from the down quilt jumped into the air and fluttered slowly down. This may have been a very typical “angelic” bed, but I didn’t care about stereotypes. The humans that tried to portray angels in artwork and stories had not concept of what they really were - just what they wanted them to be. Most people said prayers before falling asleep. I chose, instead, to d*mn everything that had angered me that day. After all, why should I be the only one destined with that fate? I could at least hope to bring those things I found terribly annoying with me to the depths of h*ll. “D*mn you, father,” I spat, staring into the full length mirror mounted beside my bed. I always started with him. After all, it was he that was the start of my problems. “D*mn you and your family!” It wasn’t long before I fell asleep, still cursing everything I hated in my dark, haunted dreams… |
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You can be so open minded that your brain falls out. 'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church. The blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet. Finally, someone tells the truth. Banner credits to Kimmy37. | |
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| QUEEN A | Jan 24 2005, 12:26 PM Post #5 |
Close your eyes and run~
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Ohhhhhh :] I like this story!! ^___^ Different from others!! Keep writing!!! KIM POST POST POST POST POSTTTTTTTTTT!! |
| sometimes...it's better this way | |
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| Michyu Girl | Jan 25 2005, 03:33 AM Post #6 |
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Don't test me.
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Awww~!! Thankies for reading, hon~! ^-^ Part 3 - My Day The early morning sun washed everything in the room a bright, pure white, including my thoughts. I loved mornings. It was another day I was alive, another chance to be a good day. Walking around my room, I gathered my clothes from the previous night and put them in the washer/dryer and set it to clean the dirty garments. After watching the attire spin for a few moments, I left the laundry closet and began to tidy up my apartment. There wasn’t much to do: wash the dishes from lunch, pick up a couple of stray napkins, wipe the table clean, sweep the floor, and take out the trash. The white, half-full bag rested lightly on my back as I walked down the three flights of stairs to the side door. It squeaked faintly when I opened it and let in a nippy breeze that caused the guard on duty to shiver. I smirked slightly as I headed for the trash bin, listening to the crunching of the night’s snow under my black boots. As I approached the dumpster, I noticed the old, homeless man curled up beside it, a pile of ashes that used to be cardboard next to him. The trash bag flew into the bin, allowing me to check on the person. I knelt beside him and blinked confusingly. Why hadn’t he dusted the snow off himself? Stroking the heap of flakes from his shoulders, I asked, “Sir, would you like something warm to drink?” No answer. “Sir?” After another short silence, I became worried. It was then I noticed he wasn’t shivering. No clouded breath was coming from his half-opened mouth. I lifted his head and looked regrettably on the ice blue face before me. The fire I made wasn’t enough… He probably fell asleep before it went out, causing him to cease feeding the flames. Anger rushed through me as I got to my feet. Even though I tried to save the man - save him from “fate,” he still died! God had won, yet again. “D*mn it!” I shouted at the brick wall before me. I walked inside, not caring if anyone was staring at me or not. I was used to it by now, anyway. Wherever I went, I received stares… Gliding up the stairs, I began to mutter, “D*mn it, God!” over and over as though I were an angered classmate of His. Once I reached my room, I looked to the ceiling and inquired through gritted teeth, “Is there any reason why you keep having to do this?” The warm water from the kitchen sink caressed my numb hands as I washed them clean. Picking up my hand, I waved my finger to motion my wallet to come to me and put itself in my back pocket. Normally, I didn’t use my “magic” for such trivial things, but I was agitated. I really needed a coffee… - “Kang Ta!” the lady behind the counter of Starbucks greeted me. “I was wondering when you’d show. You’re a little late today.” She smiled sweetly and wiped the counter as she spoke. Yes, she had a crush on me. Almost every girl I ever had contact with did. It was really starting to get annoying. “So, the usual?” “No,” I said quietly, “I’d like an English toffee latte with caramel. And get me a chocolate chip cookie while you’re at it.” She pressed her lips together as her brows furrowed with worry. “Bad day?” “You could say that.” “Oh, and it hasn’t even started,” she sighed, leaving the counter temporarily to retrieve my order. I pulled out my wallet to count out the payment and waited for her to ring up the total. Giving her the necessary cash, I wormed my way through the two lines next to me and sat in my usual spot - the booth in the back corner with very little light and life. “Can I join you?” Glancing up, I took a bite of my cookie and blinked at the woman. She looked about my age, tall, slender, nice figure, all-around sexy. I shrugged and took a short sip of my warm coffee. “Thank you,” she smiled, taking a seat across from me. “So, what’s your name?” Obviously, she thought she had a chance with me because she was sexy. I looked away from her and gazed at the door. It was almost time for me to go, anyway. “You’re not going to answer?” she tried again, tilting her head slightly and bringing her shoulder up as her fingers danced on the table playfully. Could she get any more irritating? “Goodbye,” I said shortly, getting up and taking my drink and cookie with me. That’s one thing I hated about girls - they could never catch a hint. I walked for about ten or so minutes, finishing off my breakfast, and found myself at my favorite place - the park. It was so calm there… Children would play on the playground equipment, birds would sing overhead, and adults would rest on the benches, feeling too carefree to bother me. That day, though, there was no one there. Of course, the few inches of snow might have had something to do with that… Wiping off one of the benches, I took a seat on the cold, wet wood and watched the wind push the empty swings back and forth. It was so peaceful… Coming here always made me feel better. “Here again?” I leaned back and gazed at the woman that addressed me. Immediately, I recognized her as on of the “usuals” that brought a child to play every few days. Shrugging lightly, I turned back to the swings and muttered, “Where’s your kid?” “My…? Oh, he’s not mine,” she explained, taking a seat beside me. “I baby-sit.” “I see,” I said dully. “Why do you come here almost every day?” she asked, picking up some of the remaining snow on the bench and rolling it into a small ball. “I like it here.” “I see.” There was a short silence before I turned to her and inquired, “Why are you here without the kid?” She shrugged and flicked the miniature snowball away. “It’s peaceful. It helps me clear my thoughts.” I nodded and folded my arms. After a moment, I said, “I’d better be going.” “Oh, alright,” she acknowledged, though she didn’t really sound like she cared. “See you later, or whatever.” “’Bye,” I waved, getting up to leave. She was…strange. At first, I thought she was going to make a pass at me, but she ended up…not caring at all. Tossing my napkin and empty drink container in a trash can, I shoved my now-empty hands in the satin-lined pockets of my coat and made my way back to the apartment. The day was proving to be normal - just a repeat of the one before. Nothing exciting happened. Nothing exciting ever happened. I considered it God’s way of torturing me. My afterlife was already going to be miserable, but He wasn’t satisfied with that. No, He wanted me to suffer on Earth - the only place I could ever experience happiness. “Hey, mister,” someone called suggestively. I blinked a few times as I looked at the wh*re that had called to me. I didn’t normally see them on this side of town… “What?” I asked, though I already knew why she had addressed me. “Want a good time?” she purred, running a hand against her skirt to reveal her thigh and some of her undergarments. “Not particularly,” I muttered through clenched teeth, trying to keep myself calm. My body screamed and begged to take her, but my mind protested. Always listening to the latter, I shook my head to confirm my decision and continued walking. The woman yelled after me, “What? Are you married?” I didn’t answer. “Gay?” Still, I ignored her. The fact was, I was still a virgin. I had no intention of losing that to some cheap woman that simply slept with anything that would pay for her. Normally, one would expect someone that tried to defy God on all counts to be having sex left and right just to break the “no fornication” rule, but I couldn’t do that. For one, I liked feeling pure. For another, I couldn’t risk getting anyone pregnant. I didn’t want to bring another d*mned child into the world to have to suffer what I did. I could always double the sin’s worth by being a homosexual, but, to be honest, the very thought sickened me. I couldn’t bring myself to do it, even if it was to oppose Him. As I entered the lobby of my building, the guard called to me, “Yo, Kang Ta!” I nodded to him and approached his desk. “Mail?” “Yep! Here you are!” He handed me a stack of envelopes and began to wave me away. “Thanks,” I muttered as I headed for the elevator and pressed the “up” button. “Not a problem,” he answered, going back to whatever he was doing before. Once I entered my room, I sat on my couch and sorted through the mail. Most of it was junk wanting me to sign up for credit cards or purchase some wonderful new product that would make my life so much better. There were only two letters that actually had any value. I set them aside to read later and leaned back into the couch. In a few hours, I would be at the lounge, again, singing to the hopeless women and taking their money without returning so much as a glance. That was what every day was like… |
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You can be so open minded that your brain falls out. 'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church. The blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet. Finally, someone tells the truth. Banner credits to Kimmy37. | |
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| QUEEN A | Jan 27 2005, 09:58 PM Post #7 |
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Close your eyes and run~
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OHH!! ^________^ Keep writing Kim<33 |
| sometimes...it's better this way | |
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| Michyu Girl | Feb 9 2005, 02:16 AM Post #8 |
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Don't test me.
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Part 4 - My Job As the clock turned seven, I exited my room and headed for the elevator. It only took about fifteen minutes to get to work, and I was scheduled to take the stage at eight. Most people wouldn’t show up to their jobs forty-five minutes early, but I liked to hit the bar before I began to perform. “Hey, Kang Ta!” the bartender called as I walked through the tinted glass doors. “The usual?” “Yeah,” I nodded, taking a seat beside a man that had obviously already had his fair share of drinks. Slapping a shot glass in front of me, he muttered, “There ya go, bub. What ‘cha singing tonight?” I nodded thankfully and downed the drink, holding out the empty glass for another serving. “I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “I’ll just do whatever comes to mind. Maybe I’ll get a request, again.” “The ladies sure do love ya,” he commented, filling my order. “You’re probably the only reason they come.” “Probably?” I asked. “I am the only reason they come. Most of them don’t even order drinks unless the waiter starts badgering them.” “True, that. Need another?” he mumbled, waving a slender finger at my empty glass. “No, thank you,” I answered, getting up from the bar. “I’m going to go look over my music and see what I feel like playing.” “Later, bub.” The back room was a mess. Papers, pens, and books were scattered across the floor, leaving the desk and bookshelf bare. Apparently, the boss’s stocks had dropped, again. He always threw a tantrum when his broker called with bad news. I walked to the filing cabinet and pulled out my file of sheet music. Every note and dynamic marking was memorized, so I never really needed them. Their only purpose was to remind me of their existence in my mind. As I flipped through the pages, something caught my eye. “That wasn’t there before,” I whispered, casting my gaze over the staves. It looked simple enough to play… I glanced to the title and froze. “Thanks God,” it read. Now, he was mocking me in my job?! Throwing the music to the floor, I decided to perform a couple of selections from the month before. It didn’t matter what I played, anyway. I could repeat the same song endlessly, and they’d still come. The clock finally struck eight, and I walked onto the stage. Women were still coming in sporadically, taking seats where they could find them. I sat down at the piano and opened it, looking at the white and black keys. This was probably the only thing I enjoyed in my life: the piano. A thick, pressing silence fell over the room as I brought my fingers to the keys. After a moment’s pause, I softly played the first broken chord and let the music flow into the air. It wasn’t long until my tip jar began to fill, again. As my third song came to the last chorus, a waiter approached the stage and left a piece of paper on the piano where sheet music normally would have been placed. Finishing the song, I glanced to the note and read to myself, “Thanks God.” I turned to the audience and saw a girl wave slightly, indicating it was her note. …There was something familiar about her… I got up slowly, bowed to the crowd, and went to the back room to retrieve the music. Why was I going to play it? Why was I letting that familiar woman force me to stray from my anti-God feelings? As I picked up the music from the floor and took my place on stage again, I glanced to her and tried momentarily to remember where I might have seen her. Maybe it was because she was Asian that she looked familiar… After I finished my many performances and received my tips, I walked outside to head home. That was possibly the strangest night I had ever had at the lounge… “Sir?” someone called from behind. I turned slowly to face the young woman that had made the request for the song that had mysteriously appeared in my sheet music folder. “Yes?” She nodded happily and came forward to shake my hand. “It’s been so long…” “Who are you?” I asked bluntly, cocking an eyebrow. The woman shook her head and smiled weakly, whispering, “I should’ve known…” Turning her gaze back to my face, she answered, “It’s me, Yangmi.” I blinked a few times as I tried to process what was happening. “Yang…mi…” It couldn’t be… “Oh, dongseng! I’m so glad I found you!” she shouted, wrapping her arms around me. “I’ve missed you so much!” Yangmi, my older sister, had found me. After all those years of hiding, she finally found me. “Yangmi, please…” She giggled and released me, gazing proudly into my eyes. “You’re so good at singing and playing piano! It’s wonderful! I’ll have to tell mom!” “How is she?” I asked dully, turning to lead her back to the apartment. “…Dead,” she muttered, the crunching of snow under her feet as she walked stopping suddenly. “I came to find you after she died. I thought you should know, you know…” I nodded shortly, forcing any pain that was worming its way into my heart to disappear. “And your father?” She ran after me and matched my pace beside me as she answered, “He took the news pretty hard. He’s at a behavioral center for depression at the moment…” “I see,” I said, a smirk playing on my lips. “Where are you staying?” “At a hotel down here,” Yangmi replied, pointing down the street. “So, do you have a phone number, or do I have to follow you home and camp on your doorstep to talk to you?” If a normal person were speaking, that statement would’ve been a joke. However, Yangmi was far from normal. She’d probably wait by the door for a few hours before wandering outside and flying up to my window, commanding as much attention as possible as she showed off her “powers” in an attempt to lure me from the protection of my room. Deciding that I could ignore a ringing phone better than a person putting on a light show from my window, I pulled a pen from my coat and took her hand. I wrote the number quickly on her numb palm and shoved the writing utensil back in my pocket. “There. Don’t expect me to answer whenever you call. I happen to be a busy man.” “So, you found a girlfriend?” she giggled, shoving my arm lightly. “No. I don’t date, period.” “Aw, why not, Hyunie?” I stopped dead in my tracks and repressed the urge to proclaim my detest for the name she used. “I’ll hear from you later, I’m sure,” I muttered, turning around to walk the other direction. |
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You can be so open minded that your brain falls out. 'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church. The blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet. Finally, someone tells the truth. Banner credits to Kimmy37. | |
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| Michyu Girl | Feb 28 2005, 01:50 AM Post #9 |
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Don't test me.
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Chapter 5 - My Sister I walked home alone, again, facing the bitter winds of winter. As I dodged people heading the opposite direction, I tried to focus my thoughts on something simple like music or the snow. However, they kept drifting to the week before when I had seen my sister. Her arrival already warranted the pain of lost memories flooding back, but she brought with her the news of our mother’s death. My only hope was that she made it through the pearly gates, even if the God she worshipped was cruel… How could He be seen as anything else? Just because I had traces - MERE traces - of angelic blood flowing through my veins, I was to be condemned. The angelic part of our heritage only came from one union back during the beginnings of the Bible, but the blood was so strong compared to a normal human's that it carried through the thousands of years. It will never go away. Walking into my apartment complex and nodding curtly to the guard on duty, I used to elevator to reach my floor and entered my room. As I carelessly tossed my cash from that day’s work on the finished wooden table, the phone rang. I slowly sauntered to the blaring piece of technology, d*mning it for all it’s worth, and answered, “Hello?” “Chil Hyun?” a female asked quietly. Immediately, I began to tense. “Who the h*ll are you?” She sighed with a slight chuckle as she replied, “Chil Hyun! It’s me! Yangmi!” I took a seat by my counter and cradled my forehead in the palm of my hand. That was not a good time for chitchat… “Don’t call me by that name,” I spat. “But it’s your name!” “It’s a cursed name!” “It is not!” she protested. “It’s beautiful, and it’s what our father-” “Our father,” I growled, “is the reason we’re all going to h*ll!” “Chil Hyun-” “Don’t call me that!” I warned her again. She sighed heavily and asked, “Then what would you have me call you?” “Kang Ta.” “Kang Ta?” she questioned. “Yes,” I answered simply, stroking my head to help alleviate my oncoming headache. “Well, Kang Ta,” she muttered, “we don’t have to go to h*ll! In the Bible, it says that whosoever shall believe in Him, Jesus, won’t perish, but will have everlasting life.” I leaned back in my chair and rolled my eyes. No matter how many times I turned away from her in the past, she still used the same tired argument to attempt to prove that we were capable of receiving forgiveness. “That only applies to humans.” “But we are humans!” “WE’RE DEMONS!” I shouted, jumping to my feet. “You know it. I know it. Our father knows it! We have demon blood flowing through us!” “Chil Hy - Kang Ta! You know that’s not true!” “You know it is!” “We aren’t demons! We’re mostly human, and we aren’t affected by the choices of those people in Genesis! We can-” “Shut up,” I whispered, though it was very powerful. She waited in silence for a moment before saying softly, “Kang Ta, please listen to reason.” “There is no reasoning with a God that’s turned His back on you,” I muttered. “He hasn’t!” “We were condemned from the moment we were conceived!” “No! Please, just-” I hung up the phone and buried my face in my hands. That was why I left. I could never stand fighting with others - especially those I cared about. Why had I come into this world only to be d*mned in the next? The phone rang again. Deciding to ignore it, I headed into the kitchen to begin washing the dishes. Around the fifth or so dish, I gave up pretending the annoying buzzer wasn’t there and answered, “What do you want?” Yangmi choked as she thickly answered, “I called to ask you if you would hang out with me tomorrow before work. Maybe see a movie?” “What?” I asked, wiping my hands on a cloth and moving to the couch to rest. “Well, I haven’t seen you, and I want to talk to you. Plus, you can meet my new friend.” She couldn’t have been trying to do what I thought she was doing… “Female?” Yangmi made a short noise to confirm my question as she sniffed loudly. “Are you trying to set me up?” “No. I just want you to meet my friend! That’s all!” “Really?” I was somewhat skeptical of her answer. It wouldn’t have been unlike her to try something so stupid. “I promise! Please?” Sighing heavily, I ran a hand over my face and muttered a confirmation. “Fine. I’ll see you tomorrow around four. Meet me at the park.” “Kang Ta!” she protested. “I set up the-” “Either do that, or I’m not going.” “You’re so rude!” she yelled. “But…fine. See you tomorrow.” I placed the phone back in its charger and went to finish the dishes, mentally trying to shake the dread flowing over me. I may have been part angel, but even angels had sense enough to fear the impending doom of a chick flick. |
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You can be so open minded that your brain falls out. 'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church. The blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet. Finally, someone tells the truth. Banner credits to Kimmy37. | |
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| Michyu Girl | Mar 22 2005, 06:29 PM Post #10 |
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Don't test me.
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Part 6 - My Anger The snow had stopped falling an hour before I arrived at the park. As I took a seat on the cold, wet bench, I wondered how long it would be until the snow stopped falling completely. I positively hated the cold, and each crunch under my boot only helped bring to mind the blistering winds and freezing temperatures. Just as I started pondering moving somewhere a little more south, someone called out my name. Turning slowly, I nodded to my sister and glanced to her friend. She wasn’t exactly beautiful, but I never did have a thing for girls that felt the need to bleach their hair. Judging from her face and eyes, I assumed her to be Chinese, and judging from her hair, I assumed her to be an idiot. Of course, when I was younger, I dyed my hair blond, too, but I never went platinum blond. To add to the utter stupidity of the color, it didn’t even match her face. Her eyes were a deep chestnut, she had double eyelids, her facial structure was rather smooth and oval, and her skin was slightly tanned. How she managed to keep a tan in the weather beating on my exposed skin was beyond me. “Kang Ta,” my sister interrupted my mental critique, “this is Jinni. Jinni, this is my brother, Kang Ta. Don’t let his looks fool you, though. He’s not the angel he appears to be.” She smirked at me, obviously taking pleasure in how her choice of words annoyed me. Locking eyes with her for a moment to let her know she would pay later, I turned my gaze to Jinni and held out my hand. “Hello.” “Hi,” she muttered, shaking my extended hand weakly. “And please stop looking at me like I’m an idiot.” “Wh-what?” She rolled her eyes and said, “Never mind.” “Well!” Yangmi suddenly shouted. “Looks like we got off to a great start!” She took a moment to glare at me as thought to say, “Thanks a lot, Kang Ta!” and glanced to her watch. “So, that movie?” “I don’t really feel like a movie just yet,” Jinni shrugged. “I want to get something warm to drink first.” Yangmi nodded and looked to me. “Well, Kang Ta? You know all the great coffee places.” “Follow me,” I sighed, walking around the girls to lead them to the only café I went to. - “So,” Yangmi said after the conversation died down again. Jinni leaned back into the booth as she sipped on her hot chocolate. “Kang Ta, are you Christian like your sister?” Yangmi and I both suddenly froze at the question, but Jinni didn’t seem to notice. “No, I’m not,” I muttered. “Oh. So, what are you?” Oh, the infinite ways I could answer that, I thought as I contemplated just what I was. “I…I’m not sure.” “Well, do you believe in Buddha?” “No.” “The Hindu gods?” “No.” “Do you believe there’s a higher power?” “Of course.” She sighed and ran her fingers through her hideous platinum hair. “Well, I guess that puts us up to at least Agnostic. So, do you believe in God?” I frowned at her choice of words and said, “I believe God is real, but I do not believe in Him.” “I see,” Jinni nodded. “Do you worship Satan?” “No,” I growled, getting rather annoyed at her questions. “Look, I’d like to be Christian, but-” “But what?” she asked, leaning forward. “All you have to do is-” “I know what you have to do!” I shouted. The entire café remained silent after that outburst, and I didn’t feel comfortable in the least talking in that atmosphere. “Let’s go outside.” After we were just a couple of blocks from my apartment, I turned to Jinni and said, “I know what you have to do to be saved, but that doesn’t apply to me. Get it?” “What do you mean it doesn’t apply to you?” she asked. “It applies to everyone!” “Look, it’s part of my bloodline. You wouldn’t un-” “You’re sister’s Christian, and she’s part of the bloodline.” “D*mn it!” I shouted, covering my ears. “Your worse than my sister and mother combined! Just get off me!” Jinni shrugged with annoyance and said, “Fine. No use in talking to a brick wall.” Yangmi glared at me and shook her head. “You don’t have to be so rude, Kang Ta. Jinni, let’s go. I don’t think we’ll be able to have another normal conversation with him today.” “Alright,” she agreed, turning to face me. “Goodbye, Kang Ta.” “’Bye,” I waved, hoping that it would be the last time I’d have to say anything to her. |
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You can be so open minded that your brain falls out. 'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church. The blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet. Finally, someone tells the truth. Banner credits to Kimmy37. | |
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| QUEEN A | Mar 26 2005, 12:15 PM Post #11 |
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Close your eyes and run~
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THAT'S ALL! POST MORE KIMMY<333 |
| sometimes...it's better this way | |
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| Michyu Girl | Apr 9 2005, 06:56 PM Post #12 |
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Don't test me.
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Part 7 - I Suppose… It was time for my morning coffee, again. As I left the apartment complex, I pulled up my collar to protect my ears from the bitter winds. Why did winter have to be so cold and windy in New York? Beginning to consider relocating to Florida, I saw a small gathering ahead. I wonder what that could be? I thought as I approached the crowd. “Friends, I speak the truth!” a man standing on the box in the middle of the group shouted. “God has not forsaken you!” Oh, one of those, I sighed mentally, rolling my eyes. As they got back to their normal place in my sockets, I noticed Jinni standing at the edge of the crowd. It didn’t surprise me very much, as I had assumed her to be one of those gullible Christians. After a moment, however, I noticed that she wasn’t looking to the man, but instead at someone in the crowd. I couldn’t quite determine what she was fixated on, but shrugged and turned to leave. It didn’t matter to me her reasons for being there with the street preacher. “Perhaps you think you can’t be forgiven?” the man asked to all those around him. “Perhaps you have committed a sin so great, you believe there is no forgiveness?” “Nope, not even close,” I whispered as I made my way through people coming to see what the man had to say. “Or do you believe you can’t get into the Kingdom of Heaven because of your birthright?” Immediately, I stopped and turned to face him. What had he meant by cause of birthright? What could he possibly know about it? “It matters not how you came into being or what you are!” He said what, not who. Could he know? Could he really know? “All can receive the Glory of God! You merely have to ask! Just repent! Even you can be forgiven, no matter what you are or what you’ve done!” I stepped forward to listen to what else the man had to say. Was there really hope for me, as my sister had said? Could I be saved from h*ll, even though I was a cursed being? “Kang Ta?” I jumped at the sudden utterance of my name and turned to see Jinni standing beside me. “Jinni?” “Hey. I saw you standing over here and came over to…say hey.” She stared at the ground momentarily before asking, “Why’re you here?” My first thought was to lie to protect my pride. I didn’t want to admit to the woman that had tried to convert me the previous day that I was interested in finding out how to do just that. I decided against it, however, as I really was interested in discovering how to save my condemned soul. “He said that birthright had no meaning in whether a person could be accepted by God. He also said it didn’t matter what one was. It interested me, because I had never heard that…accept from my family.” “Well, they spoke the truth,” Jinni agreed. “As long as you have a soul, you can be saved.” “What doesn’t have souls?” “Animals, really. Oh, and angels.” My heart sank quickly as I stared at her. “Angels…don’t have…souls?” She shook her head and explained, “Animals exist in the physical realm. Angels exist in the spiritual realm. Humans, however, have a physical being - our bodies - and a spiritual being - our souls.” “So if, say, a woman and an angel had a child, that child wouldn’t have a soul?” Jinni blinked at the unexpected question and seemed to be lost in thought. “Well, he’d still have a soul, because the kid would still have human in him. That’s what makes us human - our souls. The kid can’t be any kind of human without a soul.” I stared at the grey sky that threatened to release more snow and furrowed my brows with concentration. There was still hope for me. Because I was mostly human, I had a soul. “So, that half-human, half-angel child would be able to be saved?” “Yes, of course!” the woman confirmed passionately. “Like I said, anything with a soul can be saved! That’s what Jesus came to do, after all!” I glanced to her and nodded shortly. “You seem to know a lot.” “Well, I do try,” she admitted. “It comes in handy in situations such as this.” “Why are you here, anyway?” Sighing heavily, she ran her fingers through her hair and muttered, “If I tell you, will you help me?” “Help you what?” I wondered. “Well, I’m here because of my sister. This guy is bad news. He preaches the truth out here, but once they join them, it’s a completely different story.” “So he’s a cult leader?” I asked, glaring at him. Just when I was nearly convinced… How dare he try to play me! Jinni sighed again and nodded. “Yes, he is, and my sister is a hardcore member. I’m trying to get her out before something terrible happens to her!” “Bad things normally happen in cults,” I agreed, scanning the crowd for a girl that looked similar to the one beside me. I hardly knew the woman, but I wanted to help her. Besides, I couldn’t let a girl get hurt because God had let a maniac loose with His Word. Though at the moment, I had no desire to defy Him, I couldn’t help but to blame Him for the false preacher. “Alright,” I finally said, “I’ll help you.” |
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You can be so open minded that your brain falls out. 'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church. The blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet. Finally, someone tells the truth. Banner credits to Kimmy37. | |
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| Michyu Girl | May 15 2005, 04:22 PM Post #13 |
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Don't test me.
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Part 8 - I promised… After the false preacher had finished his ramblings, he announced that a meeting would be held in a nearby warehouse the following Saturday. He left the podium, and the many gathered people began to disperse, each either muttering or thinking about what the man had proclaimed. I turned to Jinni, who had yet to move, and asked, “I take it we’re going to that…event?” She just nodded slowly in response as she gazed fixatedly on one particular person in the thinning crowd. Following her eyes, I saw a girl with bright red hair and the same round, smooth face as the woman beside me. Apparently, those atrocious hair colors were the “in” thing for teenagers. What was wrong with society? “Jinni?” the girl asked as she walked forward to meet her sister. “What are you doing here?” “I came to listen to him,” she shrugged. “Well, who’s this?” she inquired as she waved a finger at me, her face burning red. Jinni glanced to me and said, “Kang Ta, meet my sister, Natalie. Nat, meet Kang Ta.” She shook my hand gently and looked at her sister questioningly. Jinni just shook her head and gave a glare as though to warn her against something. Nat rolled her eyes and huffed moodily, crossing her arms. Completely confused by the “conversation” the two had had, I cleared my throat and muttered, “I’m going to get my coffee. I’ll see you Saturday.” “Oh, you’re coming to the sermon?” Nat asked as I began to turn around. “Yes,” I answered shortly, not stopping as I headed for the café. That girl was just as annoying as her sister…possibly more annoying, considering her talkative nature and naïve attitude. Why did I have to agree to help pull her from the cult? *** The wind beat against the metal warehouse relentlessly, causing some of the weaker metal sidings to creak as they waved stiffly about. Was this really the place? Wouldn’t most people be turned off by the decrepit, foreboding appearance? My questions were soon answered as I opened the large door just enough to slip in my thin body and let the wind pull it closed. There were already a few people there, namely Nat and Jinni. The street preacher was no where in sight; so I assumed he had yet to arrive, or he was in a room somewhere planning what misleading half-truths to speak to the eager crowd. “Kang Ta!” Jinni called, waving me over. I stood in place for a moment as my gaze pierced through her, trying to show that I took orders from no one. After she diverted her eyes, I calmly strolled to her and took a seat on the worn, hideously green couch. Nat’s gaze shifted from her sister to myself several times before she muttered, “Brother Reynolds is preparing in the private room. He should be out shortly.” I leaned back lazily and voiced my only concern for the evening, “How long will this last?” “Well,” the younger of the two women drawled, “normally, his sermons are about half an hour, I guess. Some of us stay after to discuss plans for the congregation and growing church. Also, that’s when he assigns the next atoner.” “The what?” Jinni asked. “Atoner,” she repeated herself. “It’s the person chosen each week to go through the ceremony to atone for our collective sins.” My interest pricked, I leaned forward and inquired, “What’s the ceremony?” “I’m not quite sure myself, since I haven’t been chosen,” she admitted. “The previous chosen ones don’t tell about what they had to do. They say that it’s forgotten, along with the sins, or something like that. I think, though, that there’s a lot of praying involved. That’s all I know.” “Who appoints the atoner? Do they do whatever they do alone, or with someone?” I persisted. She waved her hand and explained, “Brother Reynolds chooses the atoner, of course, and he’s with them when they do the ceremony. They wouldn’t know what to do otherwise.” “Who’s all been chosen so far?” Jinni asked. Nat looked around the room and said, “Sister Jess, Sister Alisa, Sister Amber, Sister-” “All female?” I assumed. She nodded and supposed, “I guess Brother Reynolds prays for the men and the female prays for the women? I don’t know… It could just be coincidence.” Of course, I sarcastically agreed mentally. It didn’t take a genius to figure out what that little “forgiveness ceremony” really was. Jinni, too, seemed to realize the reality of the situation, as her face fell. “What’re the chances that you’ll be chosen?” I voiced Jinni’s obvious concern. “Oh, uh,” Nat thought aloud, “there have only been six chosen so far, and there are around 15 girls in the membership, so… One out of 9.” I pursed my lips with frustration, wanting so badly to let loose my powers on the false preacher for deceiving so many young girls. That bastard deserved my fate… I had to control myself, however, as I didn’t want anyone to know what I truly was. “Friends,” boomed a voice from the other side of the room, “I’m glad that you have gathered here to listen to the Word of God.” Glancing over to the man, I saw that it was, of course, the street preacher, trying to be pompous and holy. “Let us begin by bowing our heads for a short word of prayer.” Jinni looked to me and rubbed her elbow uncomfortably as those around us followed the man’s instructions. It appeared she wasn’t too anxious to oblige him, as she had already labeled him as a fraud. I just nodded shortly at her and rested my temple against my fingers as I felt a headache beginning to throb. |
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You can be so open minded that your brain falls out. 'Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church. The blood and dirt on his feet might stain the carpet. Finally, someone tells the truth. Banner credits to Kimmy37. | |
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