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| Kain's Journal | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Sun Jan 29, 2006 5:22 am (317 Views) | |
| Kain Dunarrow | Sun Jan 29, 2006 5:22 am Post #1 |
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Unregistered
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29th day 1st month 5th year 1st entry: More and more memories plague me everyday, they cause me to lose focus on my goals. My searching for the reason to weild my blade has become halted because of them. Not to mention the fact that it has become a slow process due to my newest companions that I have met. Ethstar, Eledin, Amy, and Shain, to name a few. The more time that I devote to my searching, the more time I find myself getting involved in these little side-quests with these people. However, I don’t mind doing it, it excites me and I enjoy the fighting that usually happens. But this entry in my journal was originally not about my search for a reason, or my sudden interest in these people that I have discovered. No, this entry originally began as a thought about the past. I wondered about what happened to Midgar before I left for Imythess, and I wonder about her. All the time, she haunts my thoughts, my dreams, and my aspirations. As much as I wish that I could say that I still love her, I cannot bring myself to that conclusion. The fact is that I hate her just as much as my past. I have come to the realization that when I don’t care, there are no disappointments. If I don’t expect her to return or I don’t expect her to remember me, then there are no disappointments when she doesn’t return, when she doesn’t remember. I have realized another thing about myself, the more careless about her I become, the more alcohol I drink. My addiction is getting greater, and my weakness against the blasted stuff is getting just as bad. I guess that’ll end this journal entry… there isn’t much more I can say, I need to go think… it’s what I’m best at. "If you really don't care about people, you shouldn't pretend to. When you ask if I care, I don't tell you what you want to hear; I'll tell you no..." |
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8:16 AM Jul 11

